Martin's Descriptive Paper

These are a few paragraphs Martin wrote to show his grasp of how to paint a vivid picture using words.  Now if only I could get him to finish it into a complete story.

     The fight in the newly German built warehouse had been going on for a long time. My head throbbed as if it had been hit with a club, which it probably had been. The noise in the building was so excruciating to my head. The mix of death, gunfire and explosions were enough to make any grown man run away scared stiff. That’s why I was amazed that my men had stood up and stayed to the ever growing numbers of the German leader Shwomvict Gurrandeure’s small army. Unfortunately, the force of the Germans was surprising and we were down to about thirty of my strongest guys.     

     The Germans kept pouring in through every opening in the sides of the warehouse making it harder and harder for us to get an upper hand. Bullets were flying left and right. Men were getting mowed down right in front of my face by machine guns. Some of my men were down to nothing but their fists on account of we had run low on ammo. I had a small group of my men near an opening the size of a large war tank that we had plowed into the side of the warehouse. There were a lot of bricks lying around, so they were ordered to throw them at anyone who came close.

     A not so bright German ran at my cluster of men, rifle in hand. One of my lieutenants stood up and chucked a brick right at his head. The brick connected, and his forehead and eyes caved in. Blood spurted from his face. He died on the spot, and his gun went clattering across the floor. I ran over and grabbed the rifle with one hand as I signaled one of my men to follow me. The rest stayed put.

     We ran with urgency to the other side of the warehouse all the while dodging Germans. I had about fifteen snipers at the top of the steps on the upper level of the warehouse, and thought I could rely on them to cover me while I ran to the other side, but with one look I saw that they had problems of their own.